In the last post of the Setting Healthy Boundaries series, learn how establishing healthy boundaries in your relationships will help you live a happy life. If you have been following along over the past two months and working on setting healthier boundaries, then I hope you are enjoying the emotional freedom you feel as a result of your hard work! Keep on developing even stronger boundaries throughout the rest of this year. Even though I have good boundaries, I sometimes find myself needing to set even stronger boundaries. If this is your first time reading my blog about setting healthy boundaries, please read Healthy Boundaries: Your Ticket to Happiness, the first blog post in the series, to see the full list of some of your fundamental rights as an adult, before reading this one. Setting healthy boundaries is a gift only you can give yourself.
People often believe they have to hold onto every relationship, even toxic ones that make them feel lousy. This is nonsense! People are meant to add to your life, not make you feel stressed, frustrated and aggravated every time you see them. If you have a toxic relationship and you can work with that person to create a healthier relationship, then fantastic! If not, then let that person go or set a solid boundary of only seeing that person once in awhile. I am all for repairing a relationship; however, sometimes this is not possible. All of your relationships are supposed to add to your life!
You have the right to have new relationships that add to your life.
There are many people on this planet that would be thrilled to have you in their life! The way to meet these people is by putting yourself in an environment where you are likely to meet good quality people. When you first meet someone and you sense that person would not be a good friend, then set a boundary within yourself that you will not entertain starting a friendship with that person. Keep in mind you have the right to have new relationships that only add to your life, not negatively affect you. Finding great friends takes work! I see many people start a friendship with someone they know is not good for them. They continue to cultivate the relationship, to only tell me how hurt and disappointed they are with that person months or even years later. Use good judgment when bringing anyone new in your life.
You have the right to do what makes you happy.
People who are unhappy may discourage you from doing what makes you happy. Do not allow this! Set a boundary within yourself that you are going to do what makes you happy, regardless of what anyone says. Life is too short not to live the life you want!
You have the right to fully take care of yourself in every situation.
Once you master taking good care of yourself in every situation, your life will never be the same! Make a commitment to set a boundary within yourself that from today forward, you will do everything in your power to fully take care of yourself all the time.
You have the right to trust others who earn your trust.
People need to earn your trust! If someone expects you to trust them right away, you can set a boundary by saying, “It is important for people to earn my trust, so be patient with me.” If you are starting a new relationship and someone expects you to trust them right away, then this is an unrealistic expectation. It takes two years to get to know someone. Some people are on their best behavior for the first eight months. Most people who believe they can automatically trust someone are often very disappointed.
You have the right to forgive yourself and to forgive others.
Forgiving yourself and others is a must for your emotional freedom. No one on earth can make you do this. This is a gift only you can give to yourself. When you forgive yourself for past mistakes, then you will be on your way to experiencing greater inner peace and joy. When you forgive others, you are setting yourself free from allowing people to continue to negatively affect you. Set a boundary within yourself that you will work toward forgiving yourself and others.
You have the right to fully love yourself and others.
People who feel stuck and unhappy in their lives may feel uncomfortable knowing that you are working toward loving yourself and everyone. Your actions stir up their self-hatred. You have the right to fully love yourself and others! When you accomplish this goal, happiness and peace will reside in you beyond your wildest dreams! If someone discourages you from loving yourself and others, set a boundary within yourself that you will no longer share certain information about this topic with those people.