Last week, I discussed thirty-nine rights that you have as an adult and how fully realizing these rights will help you set healthy boundaries in all your relationships. Now, for the next few weeks, I will review ways you can set healthy boundaries regarding these rights. It will be helpful to read my June 20th blog post, Healthy Boundaries–Your Ticket to Happiness, before reading this post.

healthy boundariesSetting healthy boundaries includes knowing you have the right to decide what is best for you (Tweet This).

When you become an adult, you are responsible for deciding what you want and how you are going to live your life. People may try to tell you what is best for you, but you are the only one who truly knows. When someone tells you what you “should” or “should not do,” you can set a boundary such as, “Thank you for that information, I will need to think about that before I decide what is right for me.” Then take your time to see what your intuition has to say. Your inner voice will always guide you in the right direction.

You have the right to be a good parent to the child within.

If you have gone through a difficult childhood experience, then allow yourself to be a good parent to the child within. Even if you had wonderful parents, it is still important to treat the kid within well. For example, if someone judges you about how you are having fun, then you have a right to stand up for yourself. If someone says, “I can’t believe that you are taking dancing lessons at the age of fifty-two.” You can say something such as, “Yes, I am glad I am finally taking dancing lessons, since this is something that I wanted to do since the third grade.”

You have the right to grieve any losses that you experienced whether from childhood or that you are currently experiencing. 

If you experienced any losses from childhood that you were unable to properly mourn, then it is perfectly healthy to release the sadness that has been inside of you for years. Set a boundary within yourself to give yourself time to process these earlier losses. If someone notices you were crying and suggests you have no right to feel sad about some loss that occurred years ago, support yourself by saying, “it is healthy for me to let go, rather than hold onto this sadness.” Current losses also need to be processed.

You have the right to change and grow while fully supporting yourself on this journey.

As you begin to change and grow, very often your family and friends will be uncomfortable since you have become more assertive and less of a people-pleaser. They may feel a sense of loss since you are no longer catering to their needs. People in your life may make rude comments about your growth such as, “I don’t know what happened to you. You used to be so sweet.” You can set a boundary by saying, “I am sorry that you feel that way.” There is no need to defend yourself.

You have the right to pursue your heart’s desires.

When you pursue your heart’s desires, it is important to spend as little time as possible with anyone who doesn’t support you. If you are around someone who you know will try to discourage you, then set a boundary within yourself that you are not going to share that information with that person. You have the right to set healthy boundaries!

Next week, I will review 5 additional rights, mentioned in the blog post, Healthy Boundaries–Your Ticket to Happiness, and discuss some possible boundaries that you can set. This week, practice setting one of the boundaries mentioned here.  Take one step at a time while mastering setting healthy boundaries.

Read the next post in the series, Healthy Boundaries–Your Ticket to Happiness, Part 3, to find how how you can set boundaries for healthier relationships.

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